Here is a lovely reflection on Mary and redemptive suffering.
I need reminders of this in my own life. You know I worry sometimes that one can accept sufferings that one ought to be changing. I am still struggling with the parameters of this. At heart, I believe that whatever God sends is a grace--so that it is hard to pray for deliverance. But again, we are exhorted to lay our needs before tha Lord.
I guess that the best attitude is that which St. Pio counseled: "Pray and don't worry!"
Worrywart that I am; I need this admonition! Being able to rest in the Lord and accept suffering as Grace and Tonic from His hand is in itself a wonderful grace! When, in the laboratory of my daily life, I am working on this (and it seems I often am), I find the Holy Name and the brief prayer, "Jesus, I trust in You!" to be the biggest help.